Really..What is the Point of the Scale?
Now I know, initially when I was 437 pounds, the scale meant a LOT. It meant I weighed the same amount as a mature male gorilla! Go ahead, laugh. It's ridiculous. I've been there, and anyone else who is reading this who has been that heavy can know that I relate to them.
I have a friend, the same friend who has introduced me to the paleo diet, who has convinced me that maybe the scale isn't such a big deal. Or rather, it's just not an accurate representation of weight or health. The reason I say this, is she shows me before and after pictures of her after she started paleo/crossfit.
The transformation is wonderful, much like when people "oooh" and "ahhh" at my before and after pictures. But the real kicker is she weighed more than her before pictures. I assume because the fat had turned into muscle. Obviously this will not be the case for me, because I have no intentions on having enough muscle to weight 437 pounds :P
Stop Obsessing over the Scale
Her picture was a big wake-up call for me though, because since I started my transformation I've really been obsessive about the scale. Daily checking/record-keeping of my weight and it always ruining my day first thing in the morning if the number rose at all.
Mentally to me this meant I was getting fat. Could it just mean I am gaining muscle instead? Of course it could, but why is it so difficult for my mind to process that? Fit people can weigh more than society expects them to weigh.
There is the mental reward of getting to certain number milestones too though. I remember when I got under 300lb, I was ecstatic! And then again when I hit the "200 pounds lost" mark, I could cry. My next milestones are:
218 Pounds - Means I will now weight less than the amount I've lost (at that point I'll have lost 219 pounds)
208 Pounds - According to the BMI scale, I'll no longer be obese, just overweight. Granted I think the BMI scale is sorely inaccurate.
199 Pounds - Just because I want to get into the 100's again, and this will be such a HUGE milestone for me.
170 Pounds Final Goal - Because for a 5'10" woman, this seemed to be a healthy weight
But again, it shouldn't be about the number, it should be about what I feel like and my health. But old habits die hard. I looked at the scale again this morning and the number fluctuates so much it can be maddening.
I'd still like to get under 200, no matter whether it's just fat loss or a combination of fat loss + muscle gain. But I'm going to work on not being as obsessed with hitting 170 pounds as my end goal. I just want to LOOK like a normal person again and be as healthy and fit as I possibly can. This may not mean getting to 170. It may mean being a 190 but being able to bench 175 pounds. Who knows. (I can bench 75 now, but not for long).
All I know is, I'm ready to do this. Once this flu is out of my system I am going full force into this (so far I've lost 4 pounds just from the flu). I've already changed my way of eating, I'm taking my supplements daily. I just need my health back so I can exercise heavy again.
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